Think your table manners are impeccable? That confidence might evaporate faster than steam off a hot bowl of ramen once you step into a restaurant halfway across the globe. What’s considered polite in your home country could actually be seen as offensive elsewhere. From slurping sounds to hand gestures, the world of dining etiquette is full of unexpected twists that can catch even seasoned travelers off guard.
Dining customs aren’t just about following arbitrary rules. They’re windows into cultural values, historical traditions, and social hierarchies that have evolved over centuries. What might seem like a minor detail can carry significant meaning. Let’s explore some of the most eyebrow-raising restaurant customs that might just flip your understanding of good manners on its head.
Japan: Where Slurping Is Actually a Compliment
Slurping noodles is seen as a compliment to the cook in Japan, which feels completely backward if you grew up being told to eat quietly. The louder you slurp your ramen or udon, the more you’re signaling your enjoyment. It’s honestly one of those customs that makes perfect sense once you understand it serves a practical purpose too. Slurping loudly shows the chef that you are enjoying the food and also helps to cool down the hot noodles.
There’s another quirk that trips up visitors constantly. In Tokyo, Japan, customers show their appreciation by buying more food, and tipping is almost never done. Actually offering a tip can be viewed as insulting because Japan is one of the few countries where the service is included in the price of the meal. Coming from places where tipping is expected, this feels strange at first.
You should never cross your chopsticks on your plate, as it’s seen as a symbol of death, and don’t stick them upright in a bowl of rice either, as this is associated with funeral rituals. These aren’t just suggestions either. The symbolism runs deep in Japanese culture, making these mistakes genuinely uncomfortable for your dining companions. When you’re finished with your chopsticks, place them neatly on the rest provided or lay them across your bowl.
A very common mistake made by people from the West is seasoning their rice with condiments like soy sauce or pickles, but in Japan you’ll be missing out on the chance to taste the meal the way it was intended. The chef has already balanced the flavors perfectly, so adding extra seasoning suggests you think they did a poor job.
South Korea: Elders Eat First, Always
Here’s where age truly matters at the table. One of the first rules of Korean dining etiquette is that elders start first, and respect for elders is a core value in many Asian cultures, so when the food arrives, it’s polite to wait for the senior people to begin eating first. You don’t just dig in when your plate arrives. The hierarchy is very clear and very important.
Once everyone is seated, it’s common for the most senior person to pour the first round of drinks, and you should accept the drink poured for you because refusing it is considered rude. This isn’t about being forced to drink alcohol if you don’t want to. It’s about showing respect for the gesture and the person offering it.
Korean restaurant dining is often a communal experience with families, friends, and colleagues gathering around the table to share a variety of dishes, and because of the communal nature of the meal, it’s important to have your table manners in check. The small side dishes called banchan are meant for everyone, so taking more than your fair share would be noticed immediately. When serving yourself from shared plates, use the serving utensils rather than your personal chopsticks.
One more thing that surprises people: It’s standard to pick up the rice bowl you are eating from in Japan and China, while this is considered a faux pas in Korea. Leave your rice bowl on the table and bring the spoon to your mouth instead. Small details like this really matter.
Italy: Never Ask for Cheese on Seafood Pasta
Italians take their food seriously, which is putting it mildly. Italians will never ask for extra cheese on their meal unless it’s offered, and it’s rude to ask for cheese in Italy, as it’s considered insulting to the chef who has painstakingly prepared your food. Especially with seafood dishes, the combination is seen as completely wrong because cheese and seafood combat the flavours of one another.
Traditionally cappuccino is a breakfast drink and should not be ordered after 11am, though the rules are less strict now, so feel free to order cappuccino at any time of the day, but just not with your lunch or dinner. Italians believe milk-based coffee is too heavy for your stomach after eating a meal. If you want coffee after dinner, order an espresso or macchiato instead.
There’s also the fascinating bread situation. Unlike in the US where we usually dig in to the bread basket and slather it with some butter, French bread is not meant to tide you over until the meal arrives; instead, it’s a utensil like a fork or spoon meant to sop up the delicious sauces, and bread can also be eaten after the meal with the cheese course. No butter is served with bread in Italy either. The bread is there to enhance your main course, not to fill you up beforehand.
If its kitchen is open for lunch after 2pm or open for dinner before 7:30pm, they are pandering to tourists, as Italians eat lunch early, around midday, lingering over their meal until 2-2:30pm. Restaurants catering to actual locals close their kitchens during the afternoon break, then reopen for dinner around half past seven. Eating earlier marks you instantly as a tourist.
France: The Bill Won’t Come Unless You Ask
In France it’s considered rude to bring the bill before the customer has specifically requested it, and unless there is a second dinner service, you’re allowed to linger as long as you like unlike closing time. This trips up so many visitors who sit waiting and waiting for the check, getting progressively more annoyed. The waiter isn’t ignoring you or being slow. They’re actually being polite by letting you enjoy your meal without rushing you out.
It’s generally viewed as impolite to talk about money at the table in France, so don’t split the bill when dining out with French friends, and it’s also customary for the person who invited you to dinner to get the bill. The whole concept of everyone calculating exactly what they owe is seen as tacky and awkward. Someone pays, and you’ll return the favor another time.
In France, hands must stay visible above the table, which means resting your wrists on the edge of the table rather than keeping your hands in your lap like many Americans do. It’s a small detail that locals definitely notice. The bread is meant to be placed directly on the table next to your plate unless you’re at a very high-end restaurant. No bread plate is provided because that’s just how it’s done.
French etiquette indicates that you should finish your plate, or the host will be offended thinking that the meal was bad, so if you are in France, try not to load up your plate as you will be required to finish it. This creates an interesting tension with some other cultures where finishing everything suggests you’re still hungry. Here’s the thing: in France, a clean plate signals satisfaction.
Brazil: Pizza Requires a Fork and Knife
This one genuinely surprises people. Use your utensils for all types of food, even pizza, sandwiches, and French fries, as food is very rarely eaten with bare hands, since it is considered unhygienic to do so, and if you do decide to eat food with your hands, wrap it in a napkin so your fingers aren’t touching it. The cultural emphasis on cleanliness while dining is much stronger than what most Americans or Europeans experience.
I think one of the oddest aspects for visitors is the napkin situation. What looks like a napkin dispenser on Brazilian restaurant tables isn’t really for wiping your hands. Those paper squares are more like tissues for your face. Actual hand-wiping should be done with as little mess as possible because getting your fingers greasy or dirty is frowned upon in the first place.
Brazilians do not switch knives and forks as they eat, the knife remains in the right hand, and the fork remains in the left, and when the meal is finished, the knife and fork are laid parallel to each other horizontally across the center of the plate. This Continental style of eating is considered more refined than the American style of switching hands.
It is considered bad form to leave the dinner party, or the table, at any time. Even excusing yourself to use the restroom during a meal can be seen as impolite in formal settings. Plan accordingly before you sit down to eat. Good table manners include keeping your hands visible above the table at all times, although not putting your elbows on the table, similar to France.
Thailand: The Fork Is Not for Your Mouth
The proper way to eat in Thailand is to transfer food from your fork onto a spoon and then into your mouth, or eat with chopsticks or just a spoon. Using the fork to put food directly in your mouth is considered awkward and improper. The fork is basically a pusher, helping guide food onto the spoon which then goes to your mouth.
This takes practice if you’ve never done it before. Honestly, it’s harder than it sounds at first. It’s common to allow someone else around the table to fill your plate, but if you do serve yourself, don’t pile your plate high. Thai meals are structured around sharing multiple dishes, so you’re meant to take small portions of several things rather than loading up on one dish.
In Thailand, dishes arrive all at once, not in any particular order. This differs dramatically from Western sequential courses where you get appetizer, then main, then dessert. Everything just shows up when it’s ready, and you eat from the various plates as you like. The communal aspect means everyone shares from the same dishes placed in the center of the table.
United Arab Emirates: Left Hand Stays Away from Food
Do not eat with your left hand. This rule applies throughout the Middle East and parts of Africa. People’s left hands are traditionally used in the bathroom in Islamic cultures and so are considered unclean, so you must concentrate on passing plates and using your right hand only when using utensils and eating Middle Eastern food.
For left-handed people, this presents a genuine challenge that requires conscious effort throughout the meal. Washing your hands before eating is a must, and in many places, only the right hand should touch food because the left hand is considered unclean and often reserved for toilet business. Some traditional restaurants will bring around a wash basin before the meal specifically for this purpose.
The honored guest is served first, then the oldest male, then the rest of the men, then children, and finally women, and you should not begin to eat or drink until the oldest man at the table has been served and has begun. The hierarchy at meals reflects broader cultural values about respect and social order. When enjoying meals in traditional settings, it’s customary to eat with your right hand and accept coffee or tea when offered, as refusing is considered impolite.
Depending on what you’re eating, the first big shock might be that you’re expected to eat with your hands, and foreigners sometimes associate eating with your hands with pizza or other party foods, but in the Middle East the formality range is a little bit wider. Eating rice dishes with your hands in formal settings is perfectly normal and expected.
China: An Empty Plate Means You’re Still Hungry
In China and Colombia, it’s impolite to eat absolutely everything on your plate, as some food should be left to indicate that enough food was served. This directly contradicts what many Western parents teach their children about cleaning their plates. If you finish everything, your host might think you’re still hungry, prompting them to order more.
In Chinese culture it’s generally considered polite to leave a little bit of food on your plate so that the host knows that you are full and they’ve provided enough food, though if you do finish all the food on your plate, don’t be surprised if the host offers you another serving. The challenge is figuring out how much to leave. Too little and it looks like you cleaned your plate anyway; too much and it seems like you didn’t enjoy the food.
Burping gently is seen as a sign of gratitude to the chef in China, and while you don’t have to participate if you don’t want to, you should remain open-minded to hearing a burp or two at the dining table. For people raised to think burping is mortifying, this takes serious mental adjustment. The same action that would get you scolded at home might actually be appreciated in a Chinese restaurant.
Arriving on time and being well dressed is important in China, as is ensuring that you serve others before yourself. When dishes are placed on the rotating center platform common at Chinese restaurants, you should use the serving spoons to place food on others’ plates before taking your own portion. Tipping is impolite in China, similar to Japan. The practice can actually cause confusion or offense rather than gratitude.
Learning these customs isn’t just about avoiding embarrassment, though that’s certainly part of it. It’s really about showing respect for the cultures you’re visiting and the people you’re dining with. What seems bizarre at first often makes perfect sense once you understand the reasoning behind it. These etiquette rules have evolved over generations, rooted in practical considerations, religious beliefs, and social values that matter deeply to the people who follow them.
So next time you travel, do a little homework before you sit down at that restaurant table. Your hosts will notice the effort, even if you don’t get everything perfect. Did you expect dining etiquette to vary this much across different countries? Share your own experiences with surprising restaurant customs in the comments below.
